Thursday, February 13, 2014

Googly-Eyed Monsters, Parsley & the Perfect Mom

My son is in preschool. And as such, he comes home every day with some wonderful creation he's made during craft time:
  • Play dough "creatures" with 11 googly eyes stuffed into the center of it and three pipe cleaners sticking out of the left side of its excessively eye-balled face
  • A half dozen 2'x3' sheets of original Eli paintings consisting of 3-4 strokes of blue, purple or yellow paint
  • Buttons and popsicle sticks glued to copy paper

And what I know about all these things is that in reality, he is not that interested in creating them. His teacher confirmed this assumption during his first conference (quote - 'He is not into any of our art projects'.) 

He's grown into tolerating these activities but the truth is, he doesn't like to get his hands dirty. He isn't interested in touching anything 'squishy.' He doesn't like to color but he is happy to watch you color what he tells you. So I know these lovely items I am collecting are 80% the work of the teacher's assistant and 20% Eli's feigned interest meant to appease his teachers long enough for him to get back to his true passion: trucks.

But I am a first-time mom who feels maternal obligation to cherish every item he creates during this first academic year.

This past month, I picked up Eli one Wednesday afternoon and found a small terra cotta pot filled with dirt and decorated with bits of colored paper sitting in Eli's cubby. This, I thought, is a project that I can appreciate and something we can talk about as it grows even if I am sure he didn't glue the paper on himself.

Now, I have my own issues around potted plant school projects that I think played a part in my giddiness over Eli's project. My earliest plant memory goes back to 4th grade when, as a class, we all planted bean plants in milk containers filled with dirt and, in my memory, paper towels (I haven't researched this project via youtube to verify if this memory is completely accurate but nevertheless, in my mind - dirt and paper towels.)

Anyway, guess whose bean plant never ever sprouted?  Yeah, me.

And though I don't have any severe sadness around this memory, clearly I remember it above the many other bad memories I know I have from fourth grade, so my subconscious surely deems it important.

Aside: My one other sad 4th grade memory is of my teacher (who I truly liked and who was a great teacher) walking around with his hands tucked neatly in the back of his pants and then rewarding you by handing you a palm full of peanuts from his peanut dispensing gumball machine.

But I digress. This science project served as my fourth grade epiphany - I do not have a green thumb. Growing things is not my forte. Leave it to the farmers and gardeners who can grow a bean in a milk carton, Corrie. You are not going to save your family by growing your own crops during the apocalypse. And I have lived my life since then rarely trying to grow anything and failing within 2 weeks almost consistently. 

So seeing Eli's cup of dirt with a tongue depressor sticking out of it reading 'water me' I should have thought, "Give this to his father immediately." But instead I thought, "This is my second chance."  It will be a project for both of us. Get this little plant - parsley seeds to be precise - to thrive at our home. To water it and watch it with him, hopefully riding on his little green thumb coattails.

We carried the little pot to the car, discussing how he put the dirt in the cup (not likely) and glued the papers on the pot (maybe). He thought it was very cool regardless.  I put the pot on the floor mat at his feet and threw him into the carseat and we were on our way.

In our car rides home, we often cover a very basic set of topics - what did you have for snack time? who did you play with? what do you want to have for lunch? For quite some time, the answer to all of these questions was pretty much the same - fish crackers. But the longer he has been in school, the more diverse and accurate his answers have become.

We pulled into the driveway and I walked around to get him out of his seat.  And that is when he looks at me and says, "Mommy broke my project." The pot, which for as much as I was enthralled with it at preschool, I completely forgot about as we drove down I-5 listening to the Mulan soundtrack, had tipped over and rolled around below Eli's feet.

I killed it.

I couldn't believe it. I ruined his (our) little project. And he knew it. He kept saying it over and over again.

"Mommy broke my project."
"Mommy broke my project."

Guess what he was going to say to teacher when she asked if his parsley was growing?

"Mommy broke my project."

I had to fix this. I had to show him that it wasn't BROKE and that MOM was going to fix it. So I walked Eli to the door, dropped our stuff in the house and made lunch.

I forgot about the plant for 24 hours.

But then, I remembered it again and I immediately went to the car and poured the contents of the floor mat back into the cute little color paper-covered pot, stuck the 'water me' reminder back into the  soil and proudly marched it into the house to show Eli how his project was 'fixed.'

Then I prayed.

I prayed to the sun. To the souls of all gardeners past. To the creator of parsley and school projects. Please help this little pot create something amazing for Eli despite my failures. 

I watered it on my own for a week, not wanting to bring its attention back to the preschooler in case nothing happened and I would hear, "Mommy broke my project" one more time.

And then... magic.

Parsley Plant Project
Little parsley sprouts abound. I proudly showed him the little green sprouts with all the adolescent excitement I had back in 4th grade but never got to show. Now he waters it every other day and peers at it on the windowsill when he remembers it. His project lives and I have redeemed myself a little.

I've set the bar pretty low when it comes to how perfect of a mom I plan on being. I can only go up from here.








Saturday, February 8, 2014

Book Review: The Namesake

The Namesake by J Lahiri
"Remember that you and I made this journey together to a place where there was nowhere left to go.” - The Namesake by Jhumpa Lahiri

I finished my first book of 2014...and I did it before January was even complete! I'm feeling pretty good about myself, I'm not gonna lie.

This was a great book to start out with. Not because it was uplifting. It's not the type of novel that motivates you to meet your goals for the year or makes you want to go out and adopt eight little puppies. But it did give me a new perspective on growing up and family dynamics. And new perspective is something I am interested in pursuing this year.

In an effort to be a more positive me in 2014, I am trying to take moments to better understand where other people are coming from. I've found that if I look for ways to look at life from the worldviews of others, it plays a big role in my being calmer, less critical and more positive. So a novel about Indian immigrants finding their way in America, raising children who they hope will both be better for being Americans while also expecting them to hold onto the Indian traditions they have little love for, is a perspective I find fascinating. I walked away from the novel with a new compassion for the struggles first generation children have.

You can read my complete book review on my Goodreads page. 

Saturday, January 25, 2014

GoodReads Reviews: My 2013 Read List

As much as I feel like a well-read individual, I know I don't give it the time and devotion to support such a perception. I do give it as much time and devotion as I am able to at this time in my life. From 10:30pm - 11:00pm is when I currently have a quiet room to devote to whatever story I have at hand. But if Eli refused to nap that day, if work was particularly draining or if I decided to devote 9:00pm - 10:30pm to wine drinking, then even those 30 minutes are forsaken for a good nights sleep.

A review of my 2013 reading list on GoodReads tells the story pretty well.

I read some incredible books last year. By incredible, I mean that I took something away from the story. They were books that stayed with me a few days after they were completed. Nearly all of them were books lent to me by friends or my in-laws. And they were good. 

But they total in number a whopping 5. Yep five novels in 365 days. Hardly the record of a well-read individual.

Now, this number does not include the obsessive number of re-reads I had of the Hunger Games, Catching Fire and Mockingjay this year in anticipation of the Catching Fire release. For the record, those numbers were HG (1), Catching Fire (2) Mockingjay (2). And to defend myself, I can read those in 2 nights when insomnia kicks in.

Anyway, these books deserve mentioning only because I highly recommend them and would love to discuss them with any friend who may choose to give them a read as well. I've linked the below to my GoodRead reviews in case you are curious.

The Dovekeepers by Alice Hoffman 
Origin: Lent to me by my mother-in-law
 An Object of Beauty by Steve Martin 
 Origin: I read the Shopgirl and wanted to read Mr. Martin's other novels. 









  
The Fault in Our Stars by John Green 
Origin: Lent to me by Miss Jenny Criglar
The English Patient Cover
The English Patient by Michael Ondaatje 
Origin: Purchased at the GFU bookstore in 1997(?) for my Modern Novel class.







Daily Rituals Cover
Daily Rituals: How Artists Work by Mason Currey
Origin: Lena Dunham recommended this book via her Twitter feed. Now, I don't really give two-hoots about Miss Dunham (no offense Lena) but I am impressed by young women who are able to pack their lives with everything they ever wanted to do (Mindy Kaling is my other idol).